2006-09-20
1:29 p.m.
Carrie was in Pompei last week and reported that carved into the stone streets are penises (peni?) pointing to the brothels. Now it just doesn�t get any funnier than that! Here is a picture for your viewing enjoyment. She titled this pic �PompeiDong.� Why is the word dong so hilarious? I�ve asked that question before and I�ll ask it again. Hey, it won�t let me post the picture. Arses!
Yesterday I had one of those pesky panic attacks. I know good and well why, it�s because I�m taking my certification test tomorrow and also because my parents are acting batshit crazy. What�s weirdly reassuring is that when someone hears you�ve had a panic attack so many people will tell you they�ve had one too. My first one was six years ago while I was at work and I told a nurse I worked with, who took my pulse and blood pressure and freaked out and made me get on a stretcher and took me to the emergency room where nurses started pulling my clothes off and sticking EKG things on me. And then my panic increased because I didn't want to be nekkid with all my coworkers, and also because I remembered I was wearing underwear that said "Sit down and shut up" on them. I wonder what happened to those underwears? Those were the best. But not the best when you�re making a surprise trip to the ER. So since I was stressed out I got acupuncture today on my lunch break and I feel better! than! I�ve ever felt! You have got to try this! My acupuncturist used to be a doctor in China. She says "You just take it real easy" and sticks pins in you and then plays muzak versions of Fur Elise and Let�s Hear It For The Boy. I was getting really warm and enjoying the Blue Danube with drum machine and was marveling at how acupuncture can make you feel like you�re lying in the sun, then when I opened my eyes there was a big heat lamp on me.
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