2004-08-11
11:03 a.m.
Let�s see, what have I done today. I can�t remember because it�s already so hot. Enough with the heat! Why is this happening? Is global warming coming true? My two year old is downstairs playing with things in the bathroom cabinet. Last I checked he had taken new contacts out of the box and I pray he doesn�t figure out how to peel them open. He had a bar of soap in a box he was intent on opening but that�s pretty benign. There�s nothing toxic or sharp in his reach so I don�t really care. I�m supposed to pick a book for our book club next time and I have no idea what to pick. I�d love for them to read something by David Drury but since I�m married to him it seems nepotistic to make everyone read something by him, they can do that on their own if they care to. Not that they really know he�s a writer. I don�t want to yammer on about it. I was just at McSweeney�s reading their recommends list and trying to get ideas about what book to pick. All of them seemed to be about some kind of tragedy involving children, though. Don�t want to read about that. I have to read so much about that at work that it gives me bloody diarrhea. (Or it should.) I already had an email exchange this morning with my mother - two, in fact. The first one because she loves to send me sappy, obviously made-up stories about children who�ve lost their parents and are flying on planes next to hardened strangers who don�t want to fly next to a kid. Then the stranger�s heart is softened and life forever changed by the child�s sad tale. These emails have a picture of a teddy bear or rattle between the paragraphs and play Braham�s Lullabye. I can�t stand it. I asked my mom to please not send me that stuff and she got miffed at my insensitivity towards her sentimentality. I think in actuality I might be too sentimental to read about kids losing their parents, but she probably won�t buy that. Who cares. Then she sent me yet another email about George W being the right choice for America. I asked her to please not send me political emails and I�ll do the same for her. Fair, right? Because she won�t even talk about Bush in person. I ask "Why do you like him?" and she says "Oh let�s not get into it." So I feel emailing about it is, besides being rather pointless, extra passive-aggressive. Did anyone see Grandma Lee on Last Comic Standing? She was HIGHlarious! "When I die I want them to sprinkle my ashes over Krispy Kreme. At least that way my fat daughters-in-law will come visit a couple times a week."
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