2007-03-13
1:23 p.m.
My little girl has croup and I was up with her last night while she coughed like a barking seal. Poor baby. It�s so scary when they cough like that. We took her to the doctor this morning and as he was giving her a nebulizer treatment thing he was saying he doesn�t watch tv and he loves NPR. Normally I dislike people who say that but since he was saving my daughter�s life I loved him.
We bought the Borat DVD and the cover of it is totally in Russian, or Kazahkstani or whatever, and the DVD itself looks like a burned DVD and like someone wrote �Borat� on it in marker. The brand name Devorex and it really small it says �Is live? No. Is Devorex.� We laughed like 20 minutes about that.
Oh! Last night while I was having fitful angsty sleep because of Lolly�s coughing, I dreamed I was at the Grammys and Christina Aguilera told me to get the hell out of there. She said �I�m going to pinch you� and so she did, with her long red slutty nails, and I told on her to J-Lo � "J-Lo! Christina Aguilera is pinching me!" and J-Lo told her to stop. I think I woke up after that.
I went to the eye doctor and they did that thing where they shoot the puff of air in your eye. That should be some kind of hostage torture. She sat me in front of the scary machine and said "Look at the green dot! The green dot is gonna come get you, here it commmmes�" and it took forever for the green dot to come get me and when it finally did I yelped. There has got to be a better way to do that!
I can�t get enough Neil Hamburger lately, here he is on that godforsaken Fox News show Red Eye, it�s actually the perfect vehicle for him. I love how they can�t keep up with him, those douche-whistles.
Yesterday Shane was over and I was telling him how I�m going to paint our dresser black and he said "You should paint your bedside table and the dresser the same color." I said "But it kind of doesn't matter cause the room is so small that you can't look at both of them at the same time." Shane: "Or is it so small that it's ALL you can look at at the same time?" He's the king of the sound byte, Shane. I remember when his cat Hank scratched his Beatles records and Shane said "That fucker! I will get him one day!" Then a couple months later Hank was sitting on Shane�s car engine when Shane got in and drove away and Hank got cooked to a crisp. So Shane sort of did get him, if unintentionally (so he says).
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