2007-02-14
12:10 p.m.
Did anyone else make a conscious effort not to wear pink or red today? But I�ve been sitting here at my desk painting my nails blood red before I realized the cheese connotation. Fuck it. I�m making a red velvet cake tonight and some pink panties (my favorite girl drink). I'm embracing my inner cheese which fuels my Texas-sized hair habit and fondness for Justin Timberlake. On this day in history I avenged a cruel breakup at the hands of Mark Johnson. When I was in 8th grade I had this crush on him cause he looked like the Karate Kid and he asked me to �go� with him and we held hands at Who Framed Roger Rabbit? and wrote notes every day. Then one night I got a call from Matt Caldwell and he said �Mark wants to break up with you.� The next day Matt told me that Mark asked him to call me because Matt had 3-way and Mark wanted to listen in while Matt told me for him. So I nursed my grudge for two years and by then Mark was cuter than ever and dating Serenity Sharp, a perky gymnastics bizzo, and they would make out in the hallway every day and I couldn�t stand it. On Valentine�s Day you could buy a singing valentine and have choir guys sing to someone and then give them a card. I looked through the cards on the grand piano in the choir room and saw one from Mark to Serenity, and I threw it away and wrote a new one to her that said �I guess you�re okay even though you were my second choice.� At the end of the day after everyone had gotten their singing valentine, I saw Serenity running down the hall with red puffy eyes and Mark scuffling beside her, looking scared. Vengance is mine, yo!
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